It's hard to think about anything else but the mass shooting yesterday morning in Orlando.
It's hard to imagine what it's like to walk into a night club with some of your best friends, and never walk out.
I can't help but tear up every time I think about it.
In times like these, I return to love. I feel like it's our only salvation.
Because what's the alternative?
We could get angry, sure. We could rant about politics. We could talk about how crazy people are.
But what we really need is our sanity restored. We need unity. We need remembered oneness.
The idea that there are divisions of people in this world is making the world truly insane, insane enough to want to kill.
So the burden falls on us to return to love when the world is in chaos.
It's up to us to find some semblance of peace in our lives, to find the willingness to see the light, even in the darkest, most insane situations.
And what happened yesterday in Orlando was an insane situation, one in which hate and fear blocked out all of the light.
We can't let it block ours.
If you're looking to restore some of your sanity this week and find a little peace, I urge you to go within and return to love.
Here's how I've been doing it each day:
I start each day with a ritual. A morning practice.
These daily morning practices have helped restore my sanity in times of distress like nothing else.
I cling to them now in uneasy times like these, because they've become my only defense against the insanities of the world, but they're a defense in which I find myself completely defenseless, laying down all armor and attack words, and looking closely at the person on the other side.
If you're looking for some relief from the world this week, try this:
Wake up to the Insight Timer meditation app.
Meditate for however long you want (I do about 18-20 minutes), and when you're done, read a daily lesson from A Course in Miracles.
This practice won't be for everyone, guaranteed.
The timing of it, the length of it, none of it will exactly fit the lives of every person, but the conjunction of the two, in whatever way you see fit, will surely change your life.
The whole process of meditating + reading from the Course takes about 30 minutes I would say, depending on how long you want to meditate or spend with the text.
But using these two activities in conjunction has allowed me to see the insanity of my own mind (judgement, hostility, fear, separation, anxiety) and watch it all slip carefully each day through the holy doors of love.
And I never preach anything else.
Now morning practices don't mean all of your problems are solved.
It doesn't erase the pain, or help you turn a blind eye to it. I wish I could say it was the magic solution to saving everyone in the whole world.
But it doesn't make anything go away.
Instead, it bathes all fear and anxiety in love and light.
It helps you open your arms to it.
It helps you bring it in, all the fear and anxiety you suffer with daily, and put it up in the fanciest hotel room in the world.
It helps you see it for what it is: a part of your human experience, but not a part of the real you.
If you want to try this out for a few days, here's what I'd suggest:
Download the Insight Timer app on your phone (free) >>
Download the Course in Miracles app on your phone (free) >>
When you wake up tomorrow, select a morning meditation to listen to, to help you start your day with love and an open mind.
Then open up a lesson from the Course. Start at day 1, and see where it leads you.
Taking the time to love and get to know yourself will create true change in this world, in a time when we so desperately need it.
Sending lots of love and prayers today to both you and all of the grieving,